Honesty

New glasses from my wifey, new flowers I picked after "arranging" them at work

I am not perfect, yet I know I expect a lot from my wife and daughter. As a man, I must learn to collect more patience within myself and, despite the ease with which tempers flare in this sultry heat, I must continue to exhale the negativity away.

Understanding one another comes with lots of patience and plenty of consideration for each other's feelings. My wifey has taught me more about compassion (which is probably why she reminds me so much of Ma) than any other person I know. She can feel sympathy for a total stranger because she can relate to their humanity and instantly see herself in such circumstances. At times, she might go too far and end up crying for every little "sad" story she sees on TV, but I adore her for the fact that she cares about people so much.

I care too. And my culture is one which takes care of its own. Our family is blessed beyond belief for the mere fact that we are so mixed in our ways of thinking and feeling about ourselves, our environment and our futures. Variety is the spice of life! A man in Mexican-American culture, like in Japanese culture, should be strong and should set a good example. But, in my culture, letting out emotions like anger and sadness, laughter and praise is quite the norm. In other words, to be a loud, passionate man is highly praised..

There is a difference among Japanese expectations of a man. A man in Japan must 我慢する (gaman suru) or hold back many of his inner feelings for the greater good of group. This is seen as being an adult and is valued more than releasing the fluid emotion that sometimes wells up inside. The strong silent type that occasionally "barks" at his inferiors to set them in line is treasured above all things here..

I say there has to be a balance between these two norms in our house because I can only modify my way of thinking to a limit. There's something about one's own culture that stays with us, always, no matter where we might end up living. So, Mexicans sometimes sing and cry when they drink and its usually about their women and families and that's OK too. And its cool that Japanese men do silly dances and soulful serenades at company karaoke get-togethers, but not in the presence of their loved ones. I want Lilica to know each culture's influence and let her choose her own way. In the process, I hope I can become a better man, a better father, a better husband and, overall, a better human being. OMATEOTL ("All my relations").